T he nature of human experience is such that one can be easily deceived by the limitations of one’s own perception, thought, emotion, beliefs. What you think, or what you emote, can become far more important and far bigger than the creation itself. This past week, we have been on a tour of Chennai, Hyderabad, Ahmedabad and back. One evening, someone asked me a question, ‘Sadhguru, why is it that god sent me here and now I have to work for my mukthi, or my liberation?’ Then I asked him, ‘Why do you believe that you are a god-send first of all? You don’t look like a god-send, to me.’ It just goes on endlessly like this.

People invest in one thing; from that, a world will grow out of it. One thought, one emotion, one idea, one attachment; out of that a whole universe will evolve. This is why, traditionally, they dismissed all of these experiences with just one word, ‘maya’. It is illusory, it is evolving out of your identity, it is evolving out of your thought, your emotion, your attachment. Just one thing is enough - a world will evolve, a universe will come out of it. It is happening, everybody has a universe of their own. And it looks real, more real than the real. So there is no time for the Real.

Endlessly you worry about the money that you don’t need, the future that you don’t have, the past that you cannot reclaim...

When you were a child, what little games you played were bigger than the universe; they were everything. Then your intelligence got hijacked by your hormones, the opposite sex became so big. It ruled everything, everything looked real. You became old, all those games and people became not so important, but by then you had gotten into a cycle of worry. Endlessly you worry about the money that you don’t need, the future that you don’t have, the past that you cannot reclaim, because now you have become a veteran worrier. As you age, you don’t need any reason, simply you can worry. It just goes on because you have created a false universe. And with your death, it is going to collapse, so it becomes restless and active. Somewhere it knows its existence is timed. So it is over-active and gives you all kinds of false perceptions.

This happened…a young woman went to a doctor and said, ‘Oh doctor, my body is hurting all over. Just everything in my body is hurting.’ The doctor looked at her; she looked young and quite healthy. He said, ‘That is strange. Every part in your body is hurting? Show me what is happening.’ She said, ‘Just look at this doctor,’ and she touched her right knee, ‘Haaa!’ she screamed. Then she touched her left elbow, ‘Haaa!’ She touched her neck and she screamed. Then the doctor said, ‘Okay just relax,’ and he brought a little plaster and put it on her finger. There was an injury in the finger. Wherever you touch, it hurts; every part of your body is hurting.

Everything in the universe is wrong. Nothing seems to be okay, nobody seems to be okay, you know why? Because one thing has gone wrong, everything looks wrong. So this one thing needs to be fixed. (Pointing to himself)  Is there something wrong with this? No, nothing wrong with this, it is just that this is not yet. Somebody who is not yet is trying to live a life. This is the problem. A bunch of ideas, emotions, beliefs, prejudices is trying to live a life. There is no individual here, a big crowd inside. This crowd is trying to live, this crowd is trying to get educated, this crowd is trying to build a career, this crowd gets married, produces children. Everything is confusion. Not because there is something wrong with your education, not because there is something wrong with your job, or with marriage or with children – simply because a crowd cannot get married, a crowd cannot be a parent, a crowd cannot work in any place. You can never educate a crowd.

You can only work with individual people. With a crowd you cannot do anything. Right now, this is a crowd – all kinds of ideas, all kinds of emotions, all kinds of philosophies, picked up bits and pieces from all over the planet – is ruling from within. Everything is one big mess. You can't fix this mess because this is supposed to be a mess. If you find the individual in this, there is no problem with this one. This one is fine. It is all a crowd that is hanging around – have you seen in the evenings a whole bunch of mosquitoes hanging around your head? You know why? They are not interested in your brain or lack of it. A human being is exuding the maximum amount of carbon dioxide in the head region and in the feet. They either go for your feet, not because they are bowing down to you or they think you are spiritual. They go for your head not because they think you are intelligent; the maximum carbon dioxide is generated and their receptors are drawn to the carbon dioxide.

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So, a crowd is hanging out here. You can’t fix this crowd. If you drop this crowd that you are carrying on your head, this individual is no problem. Every individual is fine, there is really no problem. It is only a ‘junk of a person’ who is a problem. I am saying ‘a junk of a person’ because this ‘personality’ is junk that you gathered from the whole world around you. This junk is a problem. This individual being – no problem. We have no problem with any being. But to keep the crowd down takes some wisdom, takes some courage, takes some sense, or at least some devotion – where you are willing to listen to somebody. Something must be there; otherwise you will carry the crowd to your grave. And when the grave comes, the crowd doesn’t die - only you die. Only the individual will die, without having lived. So fixing this means not fixing situations around us.

This happened…a husband and wife were driving in a car. Quietly they were driving, and the husband opened the conversation, ‘Mary, I know we have been married for 20 years. I know you have done your best for me. But, I want a divorce.’ She was driving at 60 kilometers per hour; she increased the speed to 80 kilometers per hour. She didn’t say anything. He looked at her, she was calm. Then he thought this was the best time to tell her and said, ‘Mary, I really want this divorce. And I also need the house because I have been having an affair with your best friend and she likes the house.’ She didn’t say anything, she just pushed the car to 100 kilometers per hour.

He looked at her, she seemed to be taking everything well. So he said, ‘Mary, I need the car. You know, I like the car very much.’ She pushed it to 110 kilometers per hour and didn’t say anything. He thought, ‘This is a great day. She’s in a great mood, not saying anything.’ So he said, ‘You know, I won’t be able to give you the bank account. I have already fixed the bank. What was a joint account, I have made it into mine because I took a power of attorney from you ten years ago, remember?’ She pushed it to 135 kilometers per hour.  Then he said, ‘Mary, don’t you want anything?’ She slowly veered the car towards the culvert on the roadside, and she said, ‘I got what I want.’ He said, ‘What have you got?’ She said, ‘I fixed the car. I have an air bag and you don’t.’

You must fix it in such a way there is no escape for this one. That is why, ‘morning sadhana, morning sadhana, morning sadhana’ is, no matter what, ‘morning sadhana’. You fix this one in such a way that there is no escape. If you leave one small hole, it will escape from that and it will be very difficult to catch it because it is a big crowd. You have heard the Vikramaditya Stories…And you don’t know where it is, but constantly it is on.

Love & Grace

*Excerpted from Darshan, 25 November 2012